Feedback

Feedback - good or bad?

What is your feeling towards feedback?  Can you handle constrcutive criticism?

In a very politically correct society, we sometimes feel we should hold back form telling people what we can see they are getting or doing wrong in case it hiurts their feelings.  But is this beneficial to them in the long run?

I use as an example, the X-Factor / Talent shows that keep turning up on TV.  How we love watching people really "Bomb" as they think they are going to take the world by storm , and are genuinely surprised to hear that they are tone deaf and can't actually sing to save themselves!  How do they manage to get their own self perception so twisted so as to appear on national television and risk such public humiliation if they get it wrong.  Clearly, someone close to them should have come forawrd with some realistic feedback earlier on in their path to this point.  

Some are so set in believing themselves to be good, they disbelieve the judges and audience - announcing they will be famous anyhow!

Positive feedback is great - makes us feel all warm and fuzzy, gives our self esteem a boost, a sense of satisfaction... 

But for personal development and growth, we need to not only listen to and take note of negative feedback - we need to actively seek it !

However, when giving negative or constructive feedback - there are ways to do it that are better than others. 

Have you heard of the sandwich way of givng feedback?  This means literally "sandwiching" a negative in between two positives....

                           Positive
                           Negative
                           Positive

eg.  Your assignment was really well presented and your covered the first topic really well. 
        The second topic was too vague and needed more detail.
       Overall, a good effort!  I really  liked your reference list.

This can be a good techinque - so long as all the feedback (good & bad) is REAL!

When giving feedback, BE SPECIFIC.... let them know exactly what could be done to improve things, and emphasize the things that they have the power to change.

When recieving feedback ...

• see it as an opportunity for improvement and growth
• LISTEN carefully - take what they say seriously and look beyond their comments to see what else can be done to improve
• if they haven't been speciific - follow it up with questions. 
• ask for advice on HOW to improve
• demonstrate your committment to improving by getting it right / doing it better the next time. 
• thank them for their feedback

 If people can see room for improvemnt or are dissatcisfied with something, and they DON'T talk to you about it, then you are under a false assumption that all is good.  This may reduce your future successes, so you are the one losing out.

  So when someone asks you what you think - do them a favour and tell them!